Friends and Friendship?

 As per usual more than likely there are grammatical errors and i sincerely apologise...

I really didn't know what to name this post so i just picked something

So, I like to believe I have a good amount of friends. Just a small circle really cause I’m not a very sociable person. And once I consider you a friend I believe in honouring that friendship and trying everything possible to keep it going. BUT if I’m trying and you’re not, what’s the sense? If I have to be constantly reaching out to you I think that obviously this friendship is one-sided and I feel like shit. There’re not that many people I sold consider my best friends, just a selected few but those few I’m very loyal to but it hurts even more if you’re trying with someone you consider a best friend and they don’t even care. Sure I understand we’re all in that stage where we might be finding ourselves and we’re growing and though some will grow apart I honestly don’t believe that we’re one of those. But what do I know I’m just a teenage girl with raging hormones. Maybe I’m just too sensitive to some things but if you can’t even acknowledge. My presence what am I supposed to think of that? You tell me if you don’t even look at me what should I think?

But I’ve come to the conclusion that if you don’t want to talk to me fine. I am NOT about to push myself where I’m obviously not wanted whether I consider you a friend, best friend, acquaintance or enemy. I’m tired of feeling used by people and feeling like I’m being taken advantage of. I don’t deserve this… no one does and I’m not gonna put myself in a position to be further embarrassed. 

OUR GENERATION

Many times I sit and think about either my generation or even the one coming up. And to be honest I’m honestly worried. Take a situation like this for example. One day while sitting in a class, take a look around you and try to imagine the people in your class as leaders of tomorrow. Sure we still have a lot of growing to do but just look around you. How many future lawyers can you pick out, or doctors? Media personnel? Accountants? Or even someone you think could be the next Usain? Shelly-Anne? Yohan? Warren? Or any other form of athlete? How many people can you pick out and say they could be the next Prime Minister or even business owner. Can you honestly say that our generation is living up to their true potential. If so then please share with me where you are.

I’m not trying to say everyone around me is a cruff but at the same time I think our generation could do so much better, myself included. We tend not to apply ourselves how we really should. We don’t put forth the effort that we should.

The generation coming up though, I really don’t know what to say about them I mean really… we have 5year olds walking around with apples and blackberry’s and you know I ain’t talking about no fruit!!! I’m not saying the advance in technology is a bad thing either. I’m just saying that at some point we have to step back and still realise that there’s an outside world with sunshine, rain, wind and the whole works. We have to keep in mind that even though technology is advancing some things still will forever remain the same. There’s a reason God gave us sunshine and rain. Even though we don’t necessarily want to step outside all the time we have to leave our houses. So don’t let it be that whenever you leave your house you can’t survive five minutes without looking at your phone because what do you expect the younger generation is going to do. Soon they’ll think it’s perfectly NORMAL and ACCEPTABLE to be driving and on the phone.

How long can you last without your phone? I know logically with everyone being so technologically advanced people do business on their phone. Fine but other than that, as a teenager how long can you last without that one device that you’re constantly on. For me it’s anything  I can read with and I’ll admit I can’t last that long but when I look at the amount of school work I could be doing sometimes I honestly believe that I should do better. I mean I can barely recall the last time I had a literal book in my hand, partly because my parents tell me to get books online, but still. If I’m just reading I think about the people who are literally glued to social networks. What would you do without that for a day? Could you cope?

xoxo

:)

RANDOM RAMBLINGS

So my birthday has come and gone and nothing really spectacular happened. So i don't really have anything to report on that :/ sorry. no crazy parties for me. went to school, class and then home...that is my life.

So, I really don’t have anything to say I just felt like typing. So hopefully something will come to me. I’m starting to think I’m gonna change my blog a little. I might change the title cause I haven’t said anything about any obsessions lately and I honestly don’t think anyone wants to read about the stuff I’m obsessing over in my troubled mind. So that might change. I’ll probably ask around for some suggestions… or not. Who knows. At this point I don’t even know what I want.

              

  So as I sit here in my living room waiting on my turn to play my piano, I sit and wonder about my life. I wonder, where will I be in 5 years? What kind of headspace will I be in then? Will I beat UWI or UTech? Will I even be in Jamaica?

Yea so, imma just cut it short and end here cause...no. just not.

xoxo

:)

9 Things I Just Can't Handle

So, while I was lying in my bed, the strongest urge to make a blog post came over me but I had nothing to write. So, I did what any other sensible person with internet access would do. I Googled it. :D I got a lot of things that I could use and I've decided to settle on this one: 9 THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T HANDLE.
So, here I go

1. When people yawn and talk at the same time. I can't. I find it sooo annoying and it just grates on my nerves to the point where I'll sit down and stare at you like WTF?!?!?

2. People who slurp. Whether it's soup, porridge(which I hate btw), tea, etc. It doesn't matter, if you're slurping I want to stab you. It's a disgusting habit that no one should ever develop. And even worse is when someone tells me that it's hot so they HAVE to slurp. NO! Just no.

3. When people pronounce my name wrong. I'll admit I've become more adjustable to it now but, if I consistently correct you about my name and you continue to call it incorrectly, especially when it's only 3 LETTERS I honestly don't know what more to do and it makes me feel like I'm talking to an idiot. If you can't pronounce it correctly just don't say my name at all.

4. When people enter my personal space. Now, I can manage this up to a certain extent. Sure when I'm in a taxi I don't expect to have the whole car to myself but if I'm sitting in a chair or just standing somewhere and you decide to stand as close to me as possible, that gets to  me. I mean really, you could have left a ruler length between us. There's no reason for us to be sharing the same air so closely. You are not my man and so you better back up real quick.

5. Chipped nail polish. Though some people don't have a problem with it. I can't stand it. Especially when it's on my fingernails. If I have on nail even slightly chipped...even if I'm out, I'll sit down at peel the nail polish off of all my fingers. It's that bad. I can't bare to see it and if one nail doesn't have polish the rest can't either.

6. People who show off unnecessarily. Now sure every one has something that they want every one else to know about but when you try to be sneaky about it, it just pisses me off more than it would have if you just came out with it. For example if we're having a conversation and you say, 'OMG, you know how many guys asked for my phone number this weekend'? or 'I want the new (insert newest technological device here) cause EVERYONE has one.' No. I know you're pretty, and have guys lining up for your number, don't rub it in, I know your parents have money and I'm broke, no need to remind me. How about you just shut your trap and walk away.

7. Romantic movies. Now before you jump ahead this is a positive one. When I watch romantic movies I bawl because I just can't manage all the sweetness. I literally sit down and tears roll down my face and I can never stop them(it happens to me when reading books as well)

8. When I say I don't like something or can't manage someone doing certain things and they do it anyway. Like really? You literally just heard me say I can't tolerate that and you go and do it not even 5 seconds later? Are you asking to get punched in the face because that can gladly be arranged.

9. When I'm suppose to list something and I can't come up with everything to fill the list. Like this last one which technically isn't one but is at the same time. It gets very frustrating and I just can't when it happens.


So this was basically a rant, sort-of thing I guess. I'm not even sure. What I am sure of though that there must be a gazillion errors in this and I refuse to re-read it and pick them out so I'm sorry as per usual. One day it won't happen(that day isn't soon though). Until Next time


xoxo
:)

I'm Sorry

I know, I know. Lately all i seem to do is apologise whenever I'm writing a post but it's not my fault I haven't been on-line for over a month. I'm obviously not suppose to have a computer cause I'm currently without one and I feel like my life is slowly but surely diminishing.

Anyway, I haven't been able to write any posts for a while so let me just send you a late seasons greetings and hope that you don't hate me. The first month in the year is coming to a close and that means that my birthday is just around the corner. And I'm so excited....even though I'm not doing anything but going to school. Sad but true.

And just one more thing to tell you: Be even stronger than you were last year. I know you can do it and I believe in you

*sigh* Jamaica, Jamaica

I apologise for any grammatical errors that you may encounter. I do this before almost every post because I really am sorry :(

Well as you guys already know. I’m Jamaican

This then means that I could not have let the time pass without saying my remarks on Tessanne winning The Voice. Now some have said that because she’s Jamaican and not American, she shouldn’t have won. And that I call bull. Why you may ask? Because even here in Jamaica, recently there was a dance competition. A dancehall dance competition and guess who won. Not a Jamaican group but a Japanese group if I’m not mistaken, called ATTACKDEM. Now if persons from international places are allowed to enter, why is there a problem that after weeks and sometimes months of practicing and eliminations that people only have a problem when they win? No, you can’t have it your way all the time. You have to accept that maybe, just maybe, someone outside of your country did better than the ones representing your country and that should be fine as well. As long as the right person wins fairly we should all be happy about it. And she won this fair and square so congrats to you Tessanne. Enjoy your moment in the spotlight and let no one bring you down, you deserve this and more.

Another thing, now as a Jamaican, I can say that we as a people are not always united. And a lot of us talk about going away and never coming back. We talk about how we hate our country and all we do is suffer. My response is, who doesn’t suffer? Going to another country doesn’t mean that we’re magically going to be alright. Going to another country doesn’t magically make everything that was wrong before turn out perfect. NO. It takes hard-work and dedication for things to turn out right, and that is what we need to learn as a people. The only time we actually are proud to be Jamaican is when one is recognized internationally and really, what kind of Jamaican pride is that? We just celebrated our 50th year of independence just last year and we were so happy then! Then it passed and everyone went back to their old ‘I hate Jamaica’ ways. Bolt won the Olympics and we were all like ‘Yup I’m a Jamaican’ Shelly-Ann won and it was the same thing. Yohan, Warren, Asafa, Veronica, Nesta, keron, etc. all proved themselves internationally and we own up to the Jamaican brand. But if nothing happens then we don’t own up to the name…why? Now Tessanne has proved herself internationally and everyone is calling her name but how many of us remembered or even KNEW that before The Voice, was Jamaica. And she lived here for so many ways and she tried to get recognized here as well…not many. And why is that? Why was it that she had to go to America for more than half of her home country to notice her?

That’s another thing! I have a question and not for just the Jamaican people but also the people that head all the different organizations in this country. What is wrong with recognizing people before they become big and recognized internationally? I mean really, it really pains my heart to see this time and time again. And this wasn’t the first case. One of the first people it happened to (that I know of) was Bob Marley. The Bob Marley. How many people know that bob Marley wasn’t actually ‘given a chance’ if a may say so, in Jamaica. He had to go overseas to be recognized because people weren’t giving his music a chance cause it was different. But when he left and became recognized, Jamaica owned up to him. The same thing happened to a classical pianist recently. I really think you should read it and I supported his decision 100% Here’s a link from the Jamaican gleaner: http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20131006/lead/lead2.html

In another article, I’m assuming there was a response from the Office of the Prime Minister. Here’s the link, also from the Jamaican Gleaner, for their response: http://jamaica-gleaner.com/latest/article.php?id=48478

Well, I think I’ll shut up now before someone gets really offended. That’s what I have to say. I think Jamaica and Jamaicans need a wake-up call we need to be united on everything as much as possible, sports, music, POLITICS. We need to come together and be able to be civil about certain matters. Know that there’s a time and place for everything but that within all of that stay true to your culture. Don’t look down on others ‘cause they have less and don’t assume because certain people have money that they think that they’re better than you. We’re all equal in God’s eyes and we all sin. So lend a hand when you can and if you see someone with talent don’t just continue to make them suffer. If you think they can make it in that industry and you can help, help them.

So yea, that’s it
xoxo
:)

2 Months To Go

I apologise in advance, like always for any grammatical errors I may have made in typing this up. I admittedly did this in a slight rush and so haven't spell checked it, so here you go.

In 2 months I’m turning 18. The big legal age!! But what I want to do for my birthday isn’t really the regular things that most 18 year olds want to do. I don’t want to go out to a club or go have an alcoholic drink for the first time at a legal age, what I really want is a birthday party. And I’m not talking about the usual, dressing up, putting on make-up and having a fancy party. No. I’m talking about something a tad more childish, or just a whole heap more childish.

I want a party where I can have a movie marathon, a piñata, and a water fight. A water fight with things like water guns, water balloons...even just buckets of water and something to scoop it up with. I know, for an 18 year old it doesn’t sound like the most ‘mature’ thing to do ever. A lot of people would call me crazy or just stupid. The time to do something completely new or something of that sort and I want a party fit for 6 year olds. I’m sorry but…wait, scratch that. I’m not sorry. Why should I be sorry for something that I want to do? Why should I care that someone else things that for an 18 year old I might be being just a little bit childish. Um, no.

It would just be me and a medium size group of friends where we’ll have a water fight and then we’d sit down, watch like a zillion movies while eating cake, popcorn, sweets, and just feasting to our hearts content. And even though all I ever say is that I have 3 friends, I’d like to believe that I have more and a good amount of them would do this with me. I mean, everyone needs to bring out their inner child and when else would be the perfect time?

But anyways, I need to go cause I need to get ready cause I’m actually going out tonight. *gasps* I know, I’m leaving my house…at night! But it’s actually a dinner for school, and even though I’m not big on dressing up I like to feel pretty too. So this is my night, to put on a dress, put on my ridiculously high heels, especially for an already tall person, leave my yard and go enjoy myself (I hope). So off I go to get ready, and even though I pride myself on being able to get ready quickly, this might just take a while.